We still are having crazy trouble with Patch and it breaks my heart, for many reasons. The poor kid gets so upset about the smallest things. I wish I could be in his brain and have some understanding to what's going on. He is SO impatient, which makes me impatient with him.
The last two months have been extremely hard with him and I can see it is starting to bother the other kids. They make comments about Patch, and last night as I got frustrated with Patch I saw Alexa holding back the tears. I'm not sure if it's because Patch was causing problems again or if it's that she's tired of me being upset. Probably both.
Patch is back to being scared when he goes anywhere alone, even in the house. I have to follow him upstairs to get dressed or be in the family room for him to watch TV. It's annoying and exhausting. At the same time, I know it's a genuine fear he has and I want him to know I'm there for him.
I am so grateful for the mothers that let him come play. It gives me a nice break, I don't think they even realize how they are helping me. I'm so thankful that he's nicer and behaves better at other peoples homes so that they continue to let him go over.
Patch has such a sweet side. I wish I knew how to help him see the nicer he is, the happier people around him are. I'm just so frustrated and I feel so guilty as the mom of this sweet boy. I feel like I've failed him somehow. Why does it have to be this hard?
Obviously we've woken up with the start of a bad day. It just seems like this is a regular occurrence for us and I need to figure out a way to break this cycle. My poor older kids are tired of being screamed at or cried to by their younger brother. It really sets the tone for the day, I just want my home to be a peaceful place.
4 comments:
I wish I had something helpful to say, but I just wanted to tell you I'm so sorry! Being a mom is so hard, especially when you're wondering what's going on inside those little people. Abbie's been really angry and emotional lately too, and I understand when you say it breaks your heart -- it absolutely does. Thinking of you!
I am sorry it's hard. And scary. And frustrating. I don't really have anything helpful to suggest - other than the thought came to me - have you tried having soft soothing music playing in the morning as your kids are getting up and ready? Maybe he's partly reacting to the craziness of the morning rush. Just a thought that passed through my head.
If you ever need to talk call me! I go through these things plus a lot more DAILY with Gavin! You are doing good even though it does not feel like it all the time!
That's a hard one. I'm working through some temper issues with a couple of my boys but that's about where it ends... I can't even imagine how hard this is for both of you - take comfort in... the Lord has given you this challenge because he knows you can handle it!
Take care sweet friend and Mommy!
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